AXA Health's Guide to the Secondary Years

A guide to the secondary years

For parents & carers

A resource for parents and carers of secondary school age children. Covering developmental milestones, physical development, communication skills, children's mental health, understanding SEND, internet safety, puberty, GCSE revision support and more.Contents

Generation next

Bad mood or big deal?

Getting past awkward

Many ways to learn

Finding the balance

Where next?

How to pass
the calm test

Heart to heart
or head to head?

Screen time
vs screen wars

The great teenage sleep shift

Your health
matters too

Where do I turn?

AXA Health

Thank you for reading

A guide to the
secondary years

1 Why we've made this guide

2 Understanding teenagers' development

3 Mental and emotional health

4 Relationships and sex education

5 Supporting children with special educational needs

6 Nutrition and exercise

7 Choosing subjects

8 Exam stress and revision

9 How to get your teen talking

10 Digital wellbeing

11 Supporting healthy sleep

12 Your health matters too

13 Trusted teen support

14 How AXA Health supports families

15 Thanks for reading

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Why we've
made this guide

We know that nothing matters
more than your family's health

A simple, reliable place to find the information and support you may need.

Compare first day and last day pictures of any secondary school student and the changes are clear to see. They join as wide-eyed children, only a few years past teddy bears and learning their alphabet, and leave as (almost) adults, embracing independence and making big decisions about their future.

It can be tough on parents and carers. As well as supporting your child through a relentless stream of change, it can also evoke a lot of emotions in yourself. It can make you reflect on your own experiences of childhood, while doing your best to support your child in the here and now.

As an experienced parent or carer, you already know there’s guidance out there to cover every step on their journey. But with so much information, it can be hard to navigate and know what to trust: whether it will actually help, and if it’s up to date.

At AXA Health, we want to help parents and carers by providing clear, easy-to-navigate information that’s created in collaboration with our qualified health professionals and trusted sources.

That’s why we made this guide: a simple, reliable place to find the information and support you may need.

Dr Imren Sterno

Head of mental health & Consultant clinical psychologist

Laura Spray

Registered general nurse, 24/7 health support line

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How to use this guide

There’s no single formula for raising a healthy, happy child. Every family and every child is different, so this guide isn’t a rulebook. It’s more of a toolkit full of information and signposts to resources to help you make your own choices.

You don’t need to read from start to finish. Dip into whatever is relevant right now and come back to it whenever something new comes up.

In every section, you’ll find information about where you can get support or find out more, along with references to where we got our information.

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Before you dive in

A couple of notes to keep in mind

Remove perfection pressure

Throughout parenthood, we all do our best to offer our children the best that we can, within our means. However, we aren’t perfect (nor should we be). If we strive for perfection, it’s unrealistic and places unnecessary pressure on ourselves.

The best thing you can do is spend time with your children and be as present as possible. Teenagers especially need a lot, and it often feels like the list of material things never ends. But spending time with them rather than money, is often a better approach.

Avoid comparison

It’s hard not to compare your teen to others – there will always be classmates who ace every exam or are leading the pack in every race. But all teens develop at their own pace, and the range of what’s ‘normal’ is wide. However, if something is worrying you, speak to your GP or the form teacher in the first instance.

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This information was created by AXA Health’s team, based on reputable sources, and reviewed and checked by our healthcare professionals.

Please also note:

School curriculums and health recommendations change, so please check the latest official information for your area.
The information in this guide is not medical advice – please always check with your GP or another health professional.
This guide is for information and support only and is no indication of the cover available through our AXA Health plans.
AXA Health is not responsible for the content of other websites or information that we refer to here.