Little steps
to big leaps

Understanding how your child develops

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What are they doing at different ages?

When other parents start talking about their child’s achievements, the words ‘still’ (is he still doing that?) and ‘yet’ (isn’t she doing that yet?) can feel very loaded. But… it’s completely normal for children to grow and learn at their own pace.

Here’s what’s typical, and when it may be time to talk to a professional. Remember, these are just guides – each child develops in their own way.
(The following age ranges are based on key stages 1 and 2 of the national curriculum, with the starting age of key stage 1 varying based on where you are in the UK.)

Ages 4 - 7

What's developing?	What they'll be doing
Physical	Becoming more coordinated, for example running and balancing Learning to grip a pencil Getting dressed independently
Emotional and social	Playing cooperatively – first friendships Starting to talk about ‘bigger feelings’ Understanding rules in a black and white way
Cognitive	Learning to read and spell Developing numeracy Following multi-step instructions and concentrating for longer

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Ages 7 - 11

What's developing?	What they'll be doing
Physical	Improving coordination Staying active for longer Possibly showing early signs of puberty, such as growth spurts
Emotional and social	Navigating friendships better Developing self-esteem based on achievements and peer approval
Cognitive	Reading and writing fluently Developing problem-solving skills Becoming more independent – for example, staying over at a friend’s

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When could it be time to seek professional advice?

Most children develop at their own pace, ending up in the same place as their peers over time. But there are a few occasions when it may be worth checking with a health professional:

losing a skill they had previously learned
persistently struggling with something peers have mastered
speech or communication concerns that don’t resolve
significant difficulties with balance or coordination
your own gut feeling that something isn’t right.

What support can I get if I’m concerned?

If you’re worried, you can speak to:

your GP (who can refer to a paediatrician)
your child’s teacher
a SENCO (Special Educational Needs Coordinator)
a school nurse.

Make a note of any areas you’re concerned about before the appointment.

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Where can I find out more?

Togetherness – developmental and emotional milestones	Handy NHS chart of milestones from birth to age 18.
National curriculum	What’s assessed and when.
BBC Bitesize	Curriculum-based learning organised by stage, nation and subject. Guides on what to expect each school year.
Parenting: Give it time	Guidance on social and emotional growth.

Support for our members

If you’re an AXA Health member and 18+, you can call our 24/7 health support line and talk to a healthcare professional at any time of the day or night.

The 24/7 health support line cannot respond to emergencies. If you need an urgent response or have a medical emergency, please call 111/999 or go to A&E. Our health professionals don’t diagnose or prescribe, and don’t replace your GP.